Happy Birthday McLayne!
16 years ago
Thursday, October 9, 2008
What do I do?
Ok, I am at the end of my rope...my normally sweet Gunner will not stop pushing Hudson. It isn't a blatant shove....he will pry one of Hudson's hands off of something so that he falls down, or lean into him so he falls over. I think that makes it worse, because it means that he knows what he is doing is wrong and he tries to be sly about it. I tried time-out, that didn't work, I have tried sending him to his room immediately, that doesn't work. Today, he pushed Hudson's hand off of a jungle gym and Hudson smacked his head into a bar...this was after he "leaned" him over in the morning on the hardwood floor. Needless to say I threw Gunner in the car, we went home and he got no stories, no TV, no feeding the fish and had to go to his room for an hour. I am getting to the point where I think I might have to try smacking his hand...help! Has anyone else had this problem..it is getting serious.
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3 comments:
Oh Carrie, Ethan does the SAME things. They know what they are doing and it's hard for us to "regulate" because it's not a blatant shove. It always falls under the category of "Be nice to your sister". Unfortunately, I don't have a magic cure for this. I still use time out for Ethan, but he still does it ALL the time. It's so frustrating, I know! I have a feeling it won't stop until the young ones are big enough to push back. Then we'll just have outright brawls to break up! And you know? I catch Salla doing it now with younger kids during playgroups when Ethan is at school, so maybe it won't be too long before she stands up for herself with Ethan. But do let me know if you find an effective punishment for Gunner because I could use the help too!
Mikie and Zachary have been doing this for a very long time (since Zachary became mobile). I too do the time-outs but also have tried spanking. What I found works ocasionally is: I don't know if you'll like hearing this, but I push him back. Since Zach can't push back yet, I want Mikie to see how it feels and most of the time he ends up crying and we talk about "do unto others". Now, I am also starting to turn a blind eye and let boys be boys. I cannot possibly referee all the time so unless it is a dangerous push I often let Zach scream at Mikie and then Zach goes and plays somewhere else. Unfair? yes, but I hope it's building character too. Good Luck!
Unfortunately all too common amongst siblings!! I also do what Tracy has done, do to Tate (in a much milder manner, and not enough to really hurt him, mostly just hurts feelings)what he does to his sister. Then we sit down and talk about how that felt to him and maybe Ayden feels the same way, etc. He still does it on occasion but it is much less than before. Leah is right and there is no magic cure, but I think it is also their age and not fully understanding how their actions affect others. Good luck with this and I hope (and know!) it will get better, but it will be some work until then!
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